Feline Warrior

I alluded, perhaps, to the busy-ness of my recent work life. Madness, I say! Things have calmed down some, I’m breathing once again and voice mail once again receives my full attention while it’s still fairly fresh.

So then, there I was, innocently minding my own business, when -in the middle of normal messages- came a vaguely familiar voice asking me to call a vaguely familiar named person. I wish I hadn’t waited until this late hour to tell you about this, because frankly, I’m tired and not in the mood for it.

Suffice it to say: Long, long ago. Much alcohol. Gallons, possibly. A supremely embarrassing situation. This, in my youth, practically. Too young to know better, but not really.

Anyway, a person involved in this situation was intentionally dismissed from my life long ago. Long ago as in directly following the incident noted above. It wasn’t just the embarrassing nature of the whole thing, but that the person seemed to believe that there could be a pattern and that perhaps be involved in that pattern. (Oh, so vague and yet the lines are not so blurry.) I have ignored various messages over the years, although truly it has been a solid decade since I’ve heard from this person - maybe longer.

But there it was: the voice, the name, that old smile in the voice that I read as that same old expectation. I am so not interested. Not interested in catching up, laughing about old times, none of it. Not at all.

But it’s distressing to me, in a way, too - my life has been colorful and interesting and certainly full. I don’t regret much at all. Instead, I’ve chosen to learn from situations and people and move on as best I can. Still, that haunting of the past is so peculiar. Sometimes, though, a memory is like a shovel: it can dig down deep, mess up the surface and bust up roots. It’s up to us, I suppose, to determine who is holding the shovel - a gravedigger or a kid in a sandbox. I’m going with sandbox today.

Oh, and just for kicks and giggles, I’m having surgery on my gums tomorrow. I’ve had this before, this surgery (but not as extensively) and it was by far the most pain I’ve ever experienced in my life. EVER. If you are prone to gum issues, obey your dentist completely!

Off to take my surgery-eve valium…